Tag Archives: Anastasia Grishina

Things we learned from Russian Nationals

Aside from the Komova stuff, obviously.

1. Grishina’s not going anywhere for a while. 

Poor thing has shitawful luck, and it seems to get worse every year. We’re not sure yet what the injury is, but are hearing partial ACL tear and kneecap dislocation. Ouch. The voyeurs amongst you can find it on youtube, we prefer to hang onto our lunches.

As well as being a personal tragedy for her, this also makes things difficult for the team because she was looking pretty usable on beam and floor.

We’re just wondering if there’s anything else that can go wrong for her.

2. Mother Russia appear to have taken a leaf out of the USAG book.

Virtually everyone got overscored to the tune of at least 0.5. You need to knock several tenths off to have a realistic idea what routines of this quality will score at Euros.

3. Afanasyeva is fat and slovenly

In her opinion, not ours. She apparently wrote that on some social networking site. Presumably referring to her performance on floor rather than her quite serviceable DTY. Brownyn is already on the way over to buck her up a bit. If she’s slovenly, there isn’t a word in the English or indeed Russian language that will do for much of the slop out there right now.

Her vault was alright, though.

4. Three tumbles and a million spins is the new black

Just ask Musty. She’s been spinning like a mothertucker.

Some would call it code whoring, but in Aliya’s case it will surely improve the overall look of the routine no end. This isn’t like an Afan 2013 situation, when she took out chunks of actual choreography to make way for dance elements.

And importantly, it means only one twisting pass- surely a good thing for Queen Musty and her helicopter legs? Plus unlike some, she doesn’t dance like she’s either a long dead corpse or a sheep on anti-psychotic medication. So in her case, what’s not to like?

5. They’d still be absolutely fucked without Mustafina

Self-explanatory really. If they win Euros, it will be because of another Herculean effort by the warrior princess of gymnastics herself.

No doubt the Rodionenkos will find some way to attribute blame to her anyway, though.


6. We’re pretty sure what the Euros team will be

Apparently it’s virtually certain to be Mustafina, Komova, Kharenkova, Sosnitskaya and Spiridova, as good a choice as any.

Forward to Sofia, comrades!