As I take up my pen to write this (fingers to type doesn’t sound half so poetic) I notice it’s been near enough a year since either of us wrote anything. I do have one excuse for this, another child who nearly crippled me for half the pregnancy and tried to kill the pair of us on the way out, and I think Bronwyn’s probably passed the time by drinking with Dmitri Bilozerchev. We may or may not amp things up a bit in the run up to Rio, I don’t know. It all depends on whether we can get our arses into gear.
Speaking of getting arses into gear, I wanted to share with anyone who hasn’t yet been able to enjoy it the wonder that was Tatiana Nabieva’s beam routine at Russian Nationals earlier this year.
10.733, and she deserved Every Single Thousandth. I think we shall henceforth be referring to her as the Blessed Nabieva. This is literally my favourite routine she’s ever done. She performed with all the verve and charisma of someone who was only there because Valentina had taken her cat hostage. Bonus points for being near enough perfect on the acro series, the most difficult part of the routine by far. I didn’t know passive aggressive beam was a thing until now.
The last time I saw someone give less of a fuck than this was when that Ukrainian just jumped off the beam in lieu of a dismount at some irrelevance in 2004. I did not think that could be topped, but then our girl rises to the challenge. My heart is swelling.
Our good friend Clerinert from wwgym has predicted that, following Mustafina’s decision to sit Glasgow out, the Blessed Nabieva will be removed from whichever speakeasy she’s currently propping up, put onto Marlboro Ultra Lights and sent out, once again, to vault for team bronze. We wholeheartedly agree.
Glasgow is coming, and I can’t fucking wait. See you there.
By Clara
September 29th, 2015 at 6:34 am
Yey, you’re back! So happy, I love your blog.
September 24th, 2015 at 12:03 am
ahahaha, ❤ you two. Thanks for the shoutout! I'll buy her first carton if she's game for Glasgow. Please keep writing!
September 21st, 2015 at 5:25 pm
I am so glad you are back!, dont leave us again!
September 21st, 2015 at 1:18 am
Yay! Also, that One Russia banner is incredibly creepy.
September 20th, 2015 at 7:38 pm
So glad to see the two of you back in action, we missed you! Nabs beam routine was a disgrace to the leotard she wore. What happen to the Russian program of many years gone past?
September 20th, 2015 at 4:04 pm
Please keep blogging – its essential for my gymnastic viewing sanity.
Oh, fancy Mustafina not going to Glasgow, and I thought at last I would see her in the flesh… even if she were an ant like spec from whichever cheap seat I get in the hydro 😉
September 21st, 2015 at 2:37 am
She might be now. I make it a point never to believe anything Valentina says though, which leaves me in a bit of a pickle since she has now claimed Aliya won’t be in Glasgow and also that she will. I’m going to Glasgow too, and would like to see her, but otoh skipping the pre-Olympic worlds worked very well for her last time.
C
October 1st, 2015 at 7:24 am
Hahaha love it! I’m going to Worlds too, so excited! Hope to see you there for deep-fried Mars bars and Afan fangirling x
September 20th, 2015 at 2:06 pm
Welcome back!