Tomorrow, my co-writer Ms Sanders will turn 30. She is an old trout. It’s also Grishina’s birthday- sweet 16. I’ve often thought the two are probably related, and they’re either twins or mother and daughter, but Bron can spill her guts about that in her own sweet time.
Anyway, life begins at 30, and here are some of my favourite examples.
The first, of course, is Chusovitina. There is no other choice. Still going strong at the ripe old age of 36 and a half, she shows every indication of contending for her fifth Olympics.
I genuinely believe she’ll still be throwing that rudi when she’s 90. She’ll make Leon Stukelj look like a lardy old chode.
Next on the list is Larissa Latynina, one of the first superstars of the sport.
Admittedly, competing until pensionable age was more common in the 60s than it is now. But we’re including her anyway, because she did something that was unusual even at the time- returned to competition after having a baby. In fact, she even kept her pregnancy a secret for the first few months. Fuck knows how she pulled that off.
Unlike our other two choices, this last one didn’t return to high level competition after giving birth. We’ll forgive him that, though. Stoi! humbly presents the Lord of the Rings, coming back to own it one last time, aged 35.
It’s hard to say which is more impressive: the routine, or his acknowledgement of fellow 30+ and silver fox Jordan Jovtchev as the rightful winner.
Stoi! readers, please share your choice of top coffin dodger with us.
Meanwhile, I’ve been rude enough already to my esteemed co-writer, so I’m going to present her with a birthday gift. Miss Ksenia Afanasyeva looking stunning on the front of IG.
Happy birthday skank!